Embrace your Aging!

Welcome back my beautiful bloggers!

        OK so for today’s post I want address the topic of anti-aging, and discuss ways that we can change our views on this process in terms of beauty and how we let it affect inner and outer-selves. I feel that it is important to address this because it is such a huge concern to women in our society. It has become extreme in the sacrifices that some women are making in order to avoid the physical effects of aging in terms of fine lines and wrinkles. Well first of all, you cannot avoid the physical effects of aging.  It is impossible… we are made of flesh not plastic. You can try, but nature does and will always win. So stop stressing about it! Don’t try to control things that are beyond your power. Now I’m going to do the opposite of that. I’m going to ask you to embrace this inevitable process. ‘Embrace it?!’ You may say?…Yes, you heard me, embrace your aging. Resisting it will only cause you further pain. So let go. And let the love and happiness in, let it replace your fears and dislikes about your body. I understand that that is much easier said than done. But I am going to help you with that by showing you some new perspectives, and providing ways that you can incorporate these into your thinking and life.

        So first I would like to discuss what inspired me to write this post. A good friend pointed out to me how she heard that Kim K does not smile or laugh to avoid wrinkles and fine lines. I was taken aback. She doesn’t SMILE or LAUGH EVER?! Well, tries not to. I don’t know about you, but this screams big “red flag” to me! To not smile or laugh usually is a strong indication that you are not happy.  I mean how could you be? Laughing delivers those good feeling hormones to us when we do. That is just one way us women try to avoid our aging process. Plastic surgery options are other ways. Injecting foreign substances into our precious skin because we dislike our appearance so much. Some may say, “well it’s only part of my appearance”. To not like part of your appearance still contributes to not liking your appearance in general. You need to love and accept all of you, ALL. Even what you consider your flaws. Learn to love them. Embrace your body fully, knowing that you are living proof of everything you’ve experienced in your entire lifetime so far. And you know what they say, you earned those wrinkles! And you really have. They are nothing to be ashamed of, all of us humans do and will have them at some point throughout our aging process. Now it’s just a matter of reversing our views on having them.

        In order to reverse our thoughts and feelings on the negativity of experiencing the physical appearance effects of aging, we need to start from the inside. This dislike and even hatred of any parts of our outer appearance is because of refusal to accept what is. We refuse to accept this part of ourselves because we don’t love it. And what is the opposite of love then? Fear. So this refusal to accept ourselves fully stems from fears. Fears like what? Fears of dying? Fears of being rejected by others because we are showing signs that we are aging, so we are considered “unattractive”? Fears that we are running out of time to live our lives? Right there. Do you see where the need for acceptance of our aging come in now?

        And if you’ve been a loyal follower of my blog so far, you know what I’m going to say next. Unconditional love. Unconditional love is vital here. Loving every part of you, no matter what-without CONDITIONS. This is why I said earlier to embrace your aging. You need to look at it with a different perspective. Look at it as a new learning experience, with even more juicy and amazing experiences that come with being an adult.  I came across a good example of this when talking with a woman who did actually embrace her aging. I first noticed when she sat down in my chair how happy she was. She was smiling and making jokes, laughing. I was immediately intrigued by her confidence and contentment. After talking with her for a bit, we came onto the subject of how old we were. She then proceeded to tell me about how proud she was to be where she was at in life. She was about 50 years old. I was pleasantly surprised to hear her tell me that if she were to choose to be my age, she wouldn’t. She said those younger years, while your skin may be soft, are times that are full of fears of the future and insecurities. She said that the wisdom she’s attained had given her a totally different perspective of life, and that she’s enjoyed all of the fun and different experiences that come with getting older. She said that she earned her wrinkles, so they didn’t bother her as much. She was living in the present moment. I was wonderfully surprised to hear this view of aging. And no, I’m not making this up! She even helped change my own perspective on it, because realistically, it is not common to come across someone who actually feels this way. Everything is anti-aging this and that. So for that reason, I have not forgotten that woman and what she told me. She basically demonstrated that happiness and true enjoyment of life overpower little stresses over some fine lines and wrinkles in your face, and that being truly happy and loving yourself completely is what is considered to be truly attractive.

        But if you are still struggling with this, since not everyone can adopt such a healthy view of life right away, another way to help soften the process of aging is to really take excellent care of yourself. Worry and stress about the aging process only contributes to your fears about it and make it much worse than it needs to be. Instead of worrying about this process, be proactive! Start implementing good health practices in your everyday life. Eating clean, exercising, spending time in nature, and being relaxed about life as much as you can. This good health on the inside of your body naturally does and will have an effect on your outer appearance too. When you eat whole foods rich in vitamins and minerals your body needs to thrive, your body works much more efficiently and well- being (can be) established. Plus your skin will love the vitamins! When you are stressed and worried, your hormones and other bodily processes can get disrupted, which can also affect your outer appearance, because your body cannot fully absorb your nutrients properly, so the skin may not receive what it needs to function healthfully. That’s without getting too much into health, but with the intention of giving you a general reminder of how health affects your outer appearances too.

        In terms of external skin care for the wrinkles, I recommend adopting an appropriate daily skin care routine. Go see a skin care professional who can recommend the correct products for your skin type and concerns. Don’t just buy $150 anti-wrinkle creams and slather them all over your face and expect miracles, setting yourself for more disappointment and continuing to fuel your aging fears. So while we know that there isn’t a way to make you look 15 again, know that there are options available to achieve good skin care health, and be patient but persistent with the process, and then relax! You are doing the best you can, and that IS enough. Good and vibrant health and happiness are the best anti aging solutions out there possible.

        OK so that is it for today’s post, I hope that I really helped you on your journey to self healing with these ideas and examples, since I know that this negative idea of aging of our outer appearances is quite strong amongst our society at this time. Don’t worry about things that you cannot control. Know that you can do your best to take positive action steps to help the situation along in a healthier way. So please take this in and try to adopt a more loving view of your aging next time you notice any lines in your face. Say, “this is part of being human!”… accept it, move on, and send yourself some love, inside and out. We all need to support each other! Thank you so much for checking this out, and I hope you are here to stay! Until next time.

        Sending you Love and Light,

   Rebecca